Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Halloween!!

No channelling of Paris Hilton in my title line today, lol.

So I'm all fairy-ed up today. It's funny, people were looking at me a little strangely when I went into a couple stores this morning. Huh. I guess fairy wings and tiaras aren't the norm. I don't think that's a world I want to live in.

Driving in wings is a bitch though, seriously.

X is Spiderman this year, and he thinks he is the coolest. He did get a little upset this morning on the way to school. "All of my friends will think I'm a fake!" he says. LOL.
Ley is Jack Sparrow. And a cuter, more precious Jack Sparrow you will never, ever find. He is terrified of anyone in a mask, even his brother. That should make for a fun day, since all the daycare kids and teachers are dressed up.

I'm staying home tonight while exMIL is taking the boys trick or treating. Lee's oldest is going trick or treating with his sister, so he's coming to hang out with me and pass out candy. It'll be nice to just sit around and do nothing on a Halloween night.
Hope you all have a great time. Don't run over any trick or treaters!!!

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

What's up, bitches?

Check me out, all rejuvenated and stuff.

So...the weekend that was...the weekend that was completely wonderful.

I got to spend the whole thing being a grown up, being with my man...and shopping for kids clothes. Wait, what? Yes. We went out of town Saturday and shopped for winter clothes for his kids (We have 4 boys between us. 8, 5, 4, and 2. What am I thinking???)
It was pretty fun actually.
He does have a flaw. He loves to shop. Me? I hate it. I like the mall. I like nice, neat rows with sizes separated out into their own little space. He likes TJ Maxx and rifling through racks and shelves. If he sees the word "Sale", his eyes light up like freakin' Christmas. It wasn't all bad. He did buy me a really nice red, quilted Calvin Klein coat at the mall. So I can put up with the shopping I guess, lol.

The boys survived their weekend. I did have one tearful phone call late Saturday afternoon, but it was ok. I think they ended up spending more time with their grandpa and his girlfriend than with their dad, but that's not so bad. At least I know they are safe and appropriately fed and taken care of when they're with the grandparents.

My boss talked me into dressing up for work tomorrow. Really nothing spectacular. I bought a tiara, fairy wings and sparkly fake eyelashes. I'll get pictures and humiliate myself by posting them next week, lol.
Everyone needs a pair of fairy wings, I have decided.
Take that to heart, ok? Go get yourself a pair.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Tears on my pillow

Umm, so I got this really nasty email saying my Thursday Thirteen was inappropriate and borderline porn. I'd like to know what kind of porn they been lookin' at. Seriously.
Anyway, to that person : You expect me to apologize or what? Not happening.

The boys' dad is keeping them for the entire weekend. He picked them up from school and just brought them in to work b/c they wanted to say good bye to me. I won't see them again until 9:45 Sunday morning. What will I do??
I mean, I have a pretty good idea of what I'll be doing...I'm driving to Lee's and spending the weekend there. But I've never been w/o my boys for over 24 hours. Except for back in June when he took Leyton and wouldn't give him back. A few of you might remember that nightmare.
I hope I'll enjoy my break and not spend the next two days worried sick.

So be thinking of me this weekend. A prayer or two would be nice, or even just some positive vibes tossed in my general direction.

Have a great weekend everyone!!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Thursday Thirteen: Switch Hit

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This week's topic is 13 pictures of women I have a "girl crush" on. No, I am not a lesbian, I don't swing both ways. Although there was this one time during 11th grade when a game of Spin the Bottle got a little freaky...

1)Carmen Electra.
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2)Molly Sims
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3)Sarah Silverman
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4)Tina Fey
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5)Rebecca Romijn
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6)Drew Barrymore
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7)Lucy Liu
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8)Pre-Skank Britney Spears
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9)Oprah Winfrey
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10)Jenna Fischer
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11)Jennifer Aniston
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12)Rose McGowan
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13)Scarlet Johannson (ignore that little "and the winner" thing in the corner.)
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So there you go. Are these chicks girl hot, or guy hot? What I mean is, are women or men more likely to share my taste in hot chicks?
Happy Thursday!

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

It's the "no time for anything serious today" post!!

Your Daddy Is Arnold Schwarzenegger

What You Call Him: Pops

Why You Love Him: He takes you to Disneyland
Who's Your Daddy?

You Are Mud Pie

You're the perfect combo of flavor and depth
Those who like you give into their impulses
What Kind of Pie Are You?

Your Life is Rated PG-13

Your life isn't totally scandalous, but you definitely don't shy away from adult themes!
What is Your Life Rated?

What Your Pizza Reveals

You have a hearty appetite. You are likely to complain if a restaurant has small portions.

You consider pizza to be bread... very good bread. You fit in best in the Midwest part of the US.

You like food that's traditional and well crafted. You aren't impressed with "gourmet" foods.

You are generous, outgoing, and considerate with your choices.

You are cultured and intellectual. You should consider traveling to Vienna.

The stereotype that best fits you is geek. You're the type most likely to order pizza to avoid leaving your computer.
What Does Your Pizza Say About You?

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Turn me on, I'm a radio

What is up with me? I don't know if it's phases of the moon, or hormones, or gypsy's TMI Tuesday, or the fact that I'm getting laid on a regular basis, but I have just been all hot and bothered lately.

I was talking about this with a friend of mine the other day, and I made the comment that I could probably get turned on by a toothpick, that's how bad it is.

Then I started thinking...there are some really strange things that turn me on. For example, hot fresh asphalt. I love it. Thinking about the smell of hot oil on the road is driving me crazy. Why? I was dating a guy who did road construction once. Sex in the cab of an asphalt laying machine is tricky, but fun.
Another weird thing is the smell of tires. If you work in a tire shop or an auto parts store in the tire section, look out. I will hit on you, even if you look like Sasquatch stepped on your face. Why? Dated a guy who's dad owned a tire shop. God I loved that back room. You know, Lee's dad owns a tire shop, so I might get to relive that one again.
Maybe I'm just a freak, I don't know. What's something that puts lovin' on your mind that others might find a bit odd?

I've also been thinking a lot about the differences between guy hot and girl hot. My Thursday Thirteen this week is going to be 13 women I have a Girl Crush on. Now, my taste is very...varied. For instance, I have huge girl crushes on Sarah Silverman and Tina Fey. But would I want to get kinky with these women? Not so sure. I'd probably just like to hang out with them and have a good time. Carmen Electra on the other hand, she's very pretty and just trashy enough to make me think I could make out with her.
This is where guy hot vs. girl hot comes into play. I have a feeling more women would say Sarah or Tina were hot than men, and more men would say it about Carmen.

Give me your opinions, people...and have a great day.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Arg, it's f**king cold!

What the bloody hell happened? Yesterday it was 80 degrees. Today it's not going to crack 70, and tomorrow's high is 54. It's time to move south for the winter. Like, straight-to-hell south, b/c that's the only thing hot enough to warm me up today.

Still dealing with C being a stalker. (For those not on the inside, C is a 42 year old metrosexual I was seeing before falling in luuuuuuvvvvv with my UPS boyfriend.)
I saw him drive by my house twice last week. He lives nowhere near me, he has no reason to be driving down my street. He will park outside of work so he has to walk by and I'll see him, he waits around for me on Wednesdays at the boys' daycare (his girls go to the after school program there. The daycare and preschool is at a church, and they have grade K-8 kids there Wednesdays after school.)
I don't suppose there's anything I can do about it except sit around being annoyed and creeped out.

L and I went to see Sleepy Hollow Saturday night. It was, as I predicted, fabulously terrible. It had it's moments...There's just something lacking when the big, strong character of Brom Bones opens his mouth and he has a voice that sounds like he's been kicked in the nuts a few times before walking onstage.
After that we went to a party where I met some scary redneck people (wahoo!), then we left and went to a bar to have a few drinks and make fun of the karaoke singers(wahoo!). It was so great, so steretypical movie karaoke. Complete with the scrawny nerd warbling "Wildfire" and the overweight guy in glasses gyrating and belting out, "I like my women just a little on the trashy side..."

I woke up the next day covered in mystery bruises, so it must have been a successful evening.

Friday, October 19, 2007

It's the freakin' weekend baby, I'm about to have me some fun

(can you name what song that is from???)

What to do this weekend, what to do?
I was hanging around eating M&Ms, doing a little retail therapy, and thought maybe I'd hit the club, try out the latest dance craze....You know, do a little lovin, laughin, and livin. But then I envisioned myself in a room full of bottle blondes...So I decided to visit this gypsy and have my fortune read. She told me I'd meet a slick, smooth operator...and I did! So I let him chat me up for a bit. Too bad. Turns out he's nothing more than a cynical bastard. Oh well, maybe I'll get lucky next time. For now, just pass me a diet coke.

Actually, my real plans are to do a big fat lot of nothing tonight, and tomorrow L and I are going to see a community production of Sleepy Hollow. Should be fabulously terrible, I can't wait. We might also do the haunted corn maze thing, we'll see. I'm afraid I'll have a panic attack from the small area and all the people. I don't deal well with large crowds of people in small spaces. No, no, no. He's trying to get one of his friends and his wife to go out with us too. This is fine, except for one small thing. The couple is having marriage trouble, the "D" word has been tossed around a lot. Now, Lee thinks that if they spend more time out and about together with a happy couple (read, me and him) they'll be able to work things out. Ok, that's sweet and all, but if they bicker and fight all night, that's going to bring me down.

Anyway, I hope you all have a great weekend!!

You Are a Margarita

You aren't just the life of the party, you are the party!
You mix a good drink, bust out some great music, and know how to get down.
What Mixed Drink Are You?

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Thursday Thirteen: Linear Linking Thinking

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Songs...One song that reminds me of...oh wait, and then there's...til I got to 13.
I should get an award for this one, ladies and gentlemen. This was work! But fun work all the same. So the first word from each subsequent song is the last word from the previous lyric. Make sense? Enjoy!

1)"Oh I....I just died in your arms tonight. Musta been some kinda..."

2)"...kiss you all over. And over again. I..."

3)"Wanna make a brother beg for it, Gimme TLC cause you know I be too proud. We can do it in the White House, try an' make 'em turn the lights out..."

4"...Champagne Supernova in the skyyyy. Wake up the dawn and ask her why
A dreamer dreams she never dies
Wipe that tear away now from your eye. Slowly walking down the hall Faster than a cannon ball. Where were you when we were getting..."

5)..."High School never ends. The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who's the best dressed and who's having sex, Who's got the money, who gets the honeys, Who's kinda cute and who's just a mess. And I still don't have the right look, And I still have the same three friends And I'm pretty much the same as I was back then. High School..."

6)"...Never ending storyyyyyy. Reach the stars, fly a..."

7)"...fantasy baby. When I close my eyes you come and you take me, on and on and on. So deep in my daydreams, but it's just a sweet, sweet fantasy..."

8)" got back. LA face with an Oakland booty. Baby got back. I like 'em round, and big, and when I'm throwin' a gig I just can't help myself. I'm actin' like an animal. Now here's my scandal: I wanna get you..."

9)" the place where I belong. Where your love has always been enough for me. Not running from, no I think..."

10)" really got me now. You got me so I can't sleep at night. You really got me. You really got me. You really got me. See? Don't ever set me free. I always wanna be...

11)" your side, by your side baby. Oh, when you're cold I'll be there, hold you tight, baby. Oh, when you're..."

12)"...low? Have you ever had a friend that let you down so? When the truth came out, were you the last to know? Were you left out in..."

13)"...the cold November rain. Do you need some time...on your own
Do you need some time...all alone. Everybody needs some time...on their own. Don't you know you need some time...all alone...

Here's the song rundown for those of you who don't recognize the lyrics.
1)I just died in your arms tonight by cutting crew
2)I wanna kiss you all over by Exile
3)What's your Fantasy by Ludacris
4)Champagne Supernova by Oasis
5)High School Never Ends by Bowling for Soup
6)Neverending Story theme song
7)Fantasy by Mariah Carey
8)Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-a-Lot
9)Home by Daughtry
10)You Really Got Me by The Cure
11)By Your Side by Sade
12)Low by Kelly Clarkson
13)November Rain by Guns 'n Roses

I see my reflection in the window, it looks different, so different than what you see

(name that tune, get a prize)

One of the best parts of my job is people watching. We're located just off the town square, which is considered Historic Downtown. We're surrounded by antique stores, boutiques, coffee shops, etc...Not to mention the beauty school next door and the pawn shop one storefront up from that.
The front of our store is all windows. A huge wall of glass, basically. So I can see everything that goes on, everyone who walks by. There are several assisted living homes around this area, so the residents stroll the square all day, every day. The book store across the street gives me a myriad of entertainment options. We have the sci-fi nerds (no, you're not automatically a nerd for liking sci-fi, I'm just sayin' these people are. Big time.), the college professors, the college students, the everyman/woman...
Things I have witnessed this morning : A woman leaving her 3ish year old daughter in charge of the baby in the stroller outside on the sidewalk while she went into a store; a man wearing gray sweatpants and a gray sweatshirt with cowboy boots and a cowboy hat; Two mildly handicapped girls holding hands and skipping across the street; A gang of goth-babies, obviously skipping school; And an old lady screaming "Praise Jesus, praise the Lord! Raise your voice in worship!" She's a legend in this town. Everyone knows her by name. She often breaks into song as well.
It's like reality tv, only better...because it's actual reality.
So I just sit here and judge them, or laugh at them, or smile at them...But I wonder what they're thinking of me?

Sometimes I forget they can see me just as clearly as I see them.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

wow, my mood is reflecting in my quiz results, LOL

You Are 44% Good

You are a fairly good person. You strive to live a moral life whenever possible.
You are usually kind, generous, and loyal. However, you do have a dark side that even you may not see.
When it comes down to ethical decisions, you tend to take the path of least resistance.
So you may end up lying, cheating, or engaging in other bad behavior... because it's just easier to do so.

You are also probably: Conflicted and confused about the current course of your life

Right now you are on track to being: A slightly crooked politician

To be a better person: Break one bad habit - whether it's telling white lies or spending too much money.
How Good Are You?

You Are a Werewolf

You're unpredictable, moody, and downright freaky.
You seem sweet and harmless, until you snap. Then you're a total monster.
Very few people can predict if you're going to be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde.
But for you, all your transformations seem perfectly natural.

Your greatest power: Your ability to tap into nature

Your greatest weakness: Lack of self control

You play well with: Vampires
What Kind of Monster Are You?

My brain hurts.

Do you ever feel like you're just taking in way too much information? Like, people just keep talking and talking to you until you just can't process it anymore?
I have been very cranky and out of sorts lately. I almost feel like I'm sabotaging myself, if that makes sense. Take L for instance. He's great, amazing, wonderful...human perfection, basically. And when I'm with him, I'm all fluttery and lovey, blahblahblah...but sometimes when I sit around and think about him, I almost hate him. Yeah, that doesn't make sense, does it? Why does he have to be so great? Why do I want to be around him all of the time??? I guess I'm just a control freak, and I'm emotional on top of that. So not feeling in control of my emotions is driving me crazy.
I also feel like I'm at the mental breaking point...for going too long without any real time to myself. I haven't had any "me" time in so long...I can't even remember! It's been over a year, I know that. Probably before X was born, so 4 years. I was reading Craze's last post, and got depressed, because I don't even know how to survive in silence anymore. I don't know how to relax, I don't know how to slow down, even for a second. I have this terrible need to be all things to all people, and I'm starting to realize that maybe there isn't enough of me to go around.

It's a good thing that realizing you have a problem is the first step to recovery...That means I've got a fighting chance at fixing the issue.
Hmmm...think I'll find a quiz or meme to lighten this place up later today...

Monday, October 15, 2007

I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me

Two weeks from now is Red Ribbon Week. It's an anti-drug/drinking thing. Last week the high school assistant principal called to see if we could get any posters or anything for it. So I looked around online and found some freebies. Then I found some with the Happy Bunny on them, and she took those. Today the freebies came in the mail, and in the package was this little list of prescription drugs with the potential for abuse. Wow, this thing would be a goldmine for someone trying to figure out which drugs are "best". It makes poppin' pills sound like a regular blast. Who wouldn't want to experience "unusual excitement","feelings of exhilaration", or "increased mental alertness"?? Gimme some of those!
Although there are a few downsides like,"urinary retention", "gastrointestinal disturbances", and "coma".
Ah, who cares? I might not be able to pee for a week, but I'd be exhilarated and mentally alert!

Things like this make me realize how backwards some forms of education are. This poster is just telling kids, "Hey, here's how to have a good time."
I used to have severe eating disorders. I'd go for days and days at a time without eating anything more than a grape, and then if I ate the grape, I'd throw it back up. I lived on diet coke, coffee, and powerade. All the treatments or counselling did was give me new ideas on how to do it better.
I do eating-disorder counselling now, and I am so careful never, ever to share the "tricks" I used and how I pulled the whole thing off. What I do share is how awful I felt, how crappy I looked, and how annoying it is to (now) be healthy and still have people following you around trying to shove food down your throat. Everyday about 5 people ask me what I've eaten, am I eating, etc...

So later today, when I'm inhaling my favorite nail polish, I'll be sure not to write down how I get all dizzy and giddy from it, but I'll tell everyone how it gives me a migraine and makes me puke for three days.

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Friday, October 12, 2007

I iz postin dis for da weekind...

Ok, the freakin' LOLcats are murdering me. Murdering me I say. I will die from laughing in 3...2...1...
Oh, umm..this is embarrassing...still alive...
Anyway, I'm jumping on the bandwagon and posting some kitteh pictures. The latest kick in the pants was given to me by Miss Doxie. She posted some, so I will too! I'm a follower!!

Leave Britney Alone!



Do me! Do me, delivery man!

I've decided this must be the vibe I'm giving out.
My gay mailman (Gaymail, for those that remember the cute little nickname I gave him.) is, in fact, not gay. He tried to grab my ass hit on me today! Apparently I am just way too friendly and give off the wrong signals...And he was doing a really good job of faking b/c I called Pink Shoes (the gay guy who used to be at the beauty school next door, who had a crush on Gaymail)afterward, and he was genuinely shocked. And he's in the know!
But when he's trying to grope me and saying, "I really love having lunch with you, we should maybe try getting together at night", with a verrrry suggestive expression on his face...
My life is a freakin' soap opera!
Last night however, it was very normal, very mom-ish. I spent an hour and a half sewing feathers to X's overalls for the parade today. Then I spent another 45 minutes stabbing holes into a Folger's coffee container and threading a heavy piece of twine through it (for a handle) to make it look like a paint can...and then I glued feathers all over it. Let me just say, Martha Stewart, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. I stabbed myself with a needle 15 damn times and nearly cut my hand off using the big kitchen knife to make holes in the coffee container. Then end result was actually pretty cute, but getting there was very difficult. Lends a whole new meaning to blood, sweat, and tears...Yes, all three were involved, and all three belonged to me.
And today I feel awful b/c I'm like, the only parent who won't be with their kid at the parade (how is it I'm the only preschool mom that has a JOB??), and to make it even worse, I forgot the camera so I can't take pictures as he walks by. (my store is on the parade route.) I can just imagine what they're all thinking, "Oh, of course, SK won't be here...Single, 25 year old mom...too busy with her job...too busy screwing the UPS guy and rejecting advances from her mailman..."
It. Makes. Me. Want. To. Screeeeaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmm.
If I were ugly or married, life would be so much easier.
I really wish sarcasm translated better to type...

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

It's Thursday, so here's Thirteen

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In an effort to expand everyone's horizons just a bit, I'm offering you this week's Thursday Thirteen. Thirteen quotes from the movie "Clue". One of my all time favorite films, it has such an amazing collection of comic geniuses playing the roles of our favorite board game characters. Enjoy, and watch the movie if you haven't seen it!!


1)Mrs. White: Yes, I did it. I killed Yvette. I hated her so much! It, it, the, it, flames, flames, flames . . . on the side of my face. Breathing, breathless, heaving breaths, heaving . . .

2)Mrs. White: Husbands should be like Kleenex--soft, strong, and disposable.

3)Miss Scarlet: Why is the car stopped?
Prof. Plum: It's frightened.

4)Wadsworth: Frankly, Scarlet, I don't give a damn.

5)Wadsworth: It's like the Mounties: "We always get our man."
Mr. Green: Mrs. Peacock was a man?

6)Col. Mustard: How did you know that?
Wadsworth: Can you keep a secret?
Col. Mustard: Yes.
Wadsworth: So can I.

7)Mr. Green: I was going to expose you.
Wadsworth: I know, so I choose to expose myself.
Col. Mustard: Please, there are ladies present

8)Col. Mustard: Just checking.
Mrs. White: Everything alright?
Col. Mustard: Yep. Two corpses, everything's fine.

9)Col. Mustard: Are you trying to make me look stupid in front of the other guests?
Wadsworth: You don't need any help from me, sir.

10)Chief: Good evening, have you ever given any thought to the Kingdom of Heaven?
Mrs. Peacock: What?
Chief: Repent. The Kingdom of Heaven is at hand.
Miss Scarlet: You ain't just whistling Dixie.
Chief: Armageddon is almost upon us.
Prof. Plum: I got news for you: it's already here.

11)Wadsworth: Professor Plum, you were once a professor of psychiatry, specializing in helping paranoid and homicidal lunatics suffering from delusions of grandeur.
Prof. Plum: Yes, but now I work for the United Nations.
Wadsworth: So, your work has not changed.

12)Col. Mustard: Why is J. Edgar Hoover on your phone?
Wadsworth: I don't know. He's on everyone else's, why shouldn't he be on mine?

13)Mr. Green: If he was such a patriotic American, why didn't he just report us to the authorities?
Wadsworth: He decided to put his information to good use and make a little money out of it. What could be more American than that?

God bless Joe Torre

It's hard being a Yankees fan. It's hard when you love a team so much that you cry because the dickhead owner is getting rid of one of the best managers in all of sports. And definitely the one with the most class. And now so many of my favorites that have been in the organization for so long are on the line...and who could blame them for wanting to leave? At least I know Derek Jeter isn't going anywhere. He's a miracle. That man will die in pinstripes.

Come to St.Louis, Joe Torre. I would never miss a game with you in the dugout. I'd buy season tickets for the rest of my life if I knew you'd be guiding the Cardinals. And you can bet they'd schedule some inter-league play if you were in STL and LaRussa went to New York.

Sorry there's no humor today. No wit, no goings on of the love life...
I'm in mourning, I am sad, I am a sports nerd.

Monday, October 08, 2007

Will Ferrell, hot sex, and too many babies

So that was my weekend, how was yours?

Saturday was fairly uneventful. I took the boys to story time at the library and we had a good day. Then around 5 they left for their adventure with GG (that's what they call exMIL), Papa, and uncle JC. What to do, what to do? L was not finished with his golf tournament.
It's strange when you don't know what to do in a silent house. I am so used to constant noise and chaos...I need to learn to relax, instead of letting the quiet make me nervous.

Around 7ish I started the drive to L's house (he lives about 20 minutes away). Because I am a sweetheart, and I knew he'd be tired and probably a little drunk after playing golf in the hot sun all day, I brought him food and more liquor (ok, so that was mostly for me...)and we stayed in all night. And that man really is all ate up in love with me, b/c we watched "Blades of Glory", and he let me gush over Will Ferrell (aka, my one true love.)all night with no complaints.
We went outside on the back deck and were mesmerized by the stars. He lives out in the middle of nowhere and the sky is so open and I swear, I have never seen the stars like that before. Last night on my own porch was really a let down.
Anyway, if you've never made love in the grass under the stars, you are seriously missing out. My previous experiences with outdoor lovin' were not quite so romantic. I'm not sure I know how to deal with all of this romance, actually. It's quite overwhelming, and isn't it sad that it freaks me out a little? Why is it making me uncomfortable? Am I not worth being treated like royalty for once?? I need to work on my self-esteem/self-worth issues, don't I?
Last night I had the nursery at church (yes, your foul-mouthed, drinksalot friend was in charge of the nursery at church. Try not to pass out or anything.) and I had two babies under 10 months, one not-quite-two year old, 2 actual two year olds (one was Leyton, my own), and X (who is 4). I was about to lose my freaking mind. Somehow I pulled through...And it really made me think. I'm glad L and I have kids already. I have 2, he has 2...great. That means there is no weird baby-pressure in our relationship. You know what I mean? When you're in a relationship with someone and for some reason you have the, "is this the person I'm going to end up with?" question running through your mind, which then turns into the, "if so, when will be have babies?" question. L and I have no baby pressure. We can just enjoy one another. And I have to say, it's really nice to just be with someone with no pressure or expectations whatsoever. I mean, it is totally terrifying to be this open and all-in with someone...I laid it out on the line Saturday night. I told him why I'm afraid of this love thing, that marriage makes me feel like death has it's cold, long-clawed hands around my heart, etc...but it's also a relief. And he was so great about it, too. He said, "So when I tell you how in love with you I am, are you going to run out of the house screaming?"
"It's a possibility, so you may want to take precautions," I answered. He stares at me for a minute, gets up, locks the door, comes back, sits on top of me and says, "I am so, so in love with you." and kisses me. And do you know what Little Miss Freak Out did?

I said it back.
I even meant it.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Aww...he luuuuvvvvvvvvvvs me

He said it. The big "L" word.
We were on the phone last night, and I said something particularly hilarious. Through his gales of laughter he said, "And that is exactly why I love you."
Dead air. Then in a softer voice, "Hey, and I really mean that."

I didn't throw up or anything. I didn't even say, "Umm...thanks?" in an awkward way and then quickly hang up. Actually I said, "Yeah, well, you're all right too....I guess."
More laughter followed.
It was really just too, too romantic for words.

We're trying to decide what to do tomorrow night. Go out? Stay home?
I suggested going to The Monster Corn Maze. It's this corn maze thing (no, really?)where the people dress up in scary costumes and leap out at you. Probably incredibly ridiculous...but the fact that it's a maze made in a corn field is enough to scare me. Have you seen Children of the Corn? It's terrifying. Anyway, if you want a laugh, check out the rules.
No throwing of the corn. You got that?

Actually, I'm in a very lazy sort of mood. Maybe we'll just lay in bed,watch stupid movies and eat junk all night. That sounds more appealing by the second.

Who knows, now that we're in love and all, maybe we'll do something special. He's always coming up with ideas. I wonder how long that will last?

Thursday, October 04, 2007

Thursday Thirteen, Ya'll

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Today's Topic: 13 Themed Parties I'd love to attend.

1)White Trash-O-Rama. Oh, wait...that's just Saturday night.

2)A masquerade ball. Just like in the movie "The Labyrinth" when Sarah is dressed in the big fluffy white dress and The Goblin King(David Bowie! Be still my beating heart!) is singing, and everyone is wearing the masks...

3)Rocky Horror Picture Show. I have always, ALWAYS wanted to go to one of the midnight movie showings in Kansas City and dress up...Would I be Janet or Magenta??? I'll go twice.

4)The Jimmy Buffet Buffet. Just think of it. There'd be parrots everywhere, guys could draw on a pencil thin mustache, we'd be drinking margaritas and eating cheeseburgers in paradise...Then we'd all get drunk and screw.

5)An office party. No, this isn't really a theme, but I have never been to an office party. Probably b/c I've never worked in an office...Maybe, it could be just like the Christmas party on The Office. Ok, that's the theme.

6)Musical Theatre. No speaking all night. You can only converse in song. Yes.

7)The 'bring your pillow and take a nap party'. Because, let's face it, we all get tired sometimes.

8)The 'I literally just rolled out of bed' party. Really, this one is the after-party for #7. It'll be a rockin' time, I swear. Irish coffee, breath mints, perfection.

9)The black, white, and red all over ball. I keep trying to pitch this one to the library for a fundraiser. Everyone would be required to dress in black, white, or red. I would love to organize that...

10)A clam-bake on the beach. Totally Elvis, totally Frankie and Annette.

11)One of P Diddy's bday parties. The cristal is poppin', the hennesey is flowin'...

12)Shaun of the Dead. Where you can only talk in movie quotes, but you can never say the zed word...

13)The 'Samantha is the coolest person in the whole wide world' party...but really, I attend that everyday. Teehee.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

A little ice would be nice...

Uh,oh. It's happening. The glassy eyed stare at the engagement rings in the jewelry store window.
No, no, no...I don't really want to get married...but wouldn't it be so much fun to lug a crazy sparkler around?
The jewelry store had a new display out and I stopped and stared as I walked by on my way to work this morning. The sun must have been hitting them just right b/c I could not avoid the magnetic pull of the pretty, pretty diamonds.
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I'm like a squirrel.

So then I got to daydreaming about L, and thinking how wonderful he is, and that he is definitely marriage material...but then I remembered that marriage scares the crap out of me now. It's kind of past relationships, this is when I'd bolt. If anyone even hinted at forever, this bitch would be gettin' the heck out of Dodge.
My philosophy up til now has been, "make sure he loves you more". And up until last year, that worked fine. I got to be adored and worshipped, and when I got tired of it I just got out. I only became emotionally involved (to where I was sad about the ending of the relationship) about a handful of times. Unfortunately, with my marriage, the emotions involved were mine about the kids. I wanted them to have this great family, with the parents who stayed together and the mom who had all the neighborhood kids running in and out all day long...Part of it can still be true. My marriage would have been a lot better if I'd been more in love and hadn't taken for granted the fact that it had a lifetime guarantee. Nothing has a lifetime guarantee, not even those products on tv that say they do. How long do you really think some of those businesses will stay in operation? I was so willing to paste on a smile and pretend to be supremely happy even though I wasn't. It took my husband leaving for me to realize I was so miserable. When it happened I was just so panic stricken. How will I ever survive on my own? I had no job and no income of my own AT ALL, and suddenly I have to raise 2 boys alone.
And now in the aftermath, I am happier and more stable than I have ever been before. And I did it All. By. Myself.

So back to today and the flashy diamonds in the window...
Maybe I'm thinking getting married again someday isn't such a bad thing. But it would have to be a long way in the future.
I had a little fun and looked online for some pretties, and here are my favorites:
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I will never again want a diamond solitaire. Been there, done that, pawned it to pay for a lawyer.
The wedding bands my ex and I had were my great-grandparents' wedding's such a shame that they went to waste. I can't exactly use them again, can I?? LOL. Try to imagine me pitching that idea to someone.
"Well, they worked for my great-grandparents, failed me in my first marriage, but they're really pretty so let's try 'em again!"
I'm sure I'd be met with a resounding 'no!'.

So Samantha is off visiting fantasyland today...and enjoying every minute of it. It's kind of nice to think about forever in a calm, rational way...without vomiting.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

AAah! Woah, the new stuff scared me there for a second...

How's ya like the temporary makeover?

I have a secret...

...that I have been hiding from you for nearly a month.
My superhot and completely delicious boyfriend? He's bald. Yep. There. I said it. He always, and I mean *always*, wears a hat when out in public, and women literally turn around and stare openly at him. It's the tan, the arms he got from carrying boxes all over the place, not to mention the pretty face. I feel slightly jealous on occasion, but mostly wear a look of, "That's right, bitch. He's mine".
But he's bald.

It doesn't bother me. In fact, I find it endearing (there actually is a physical flaw!). But he's a little insecure about it, therefore, the hat. I keep telling him if he'd just cut the rest of his hair very short, it wouldn't be that bad...but he is desperately clinging to the hope that it will magically grow back one day. Sorry sweet thang, but you're 38. Good luck with that.
Perhaps I am merely 25 year old arm candy to take his mind off the inching back of the hairline..."I might not have hair, but I have a hot ass girlfriend."

I'm cool with that.

Monday, October 01, 2007

This is my 200th post...My palms are sweating, tension headache building...Oh, the pressure!!

Ok, this isn't going to be anything special, sorry.

So this weekend was the **80's Party**. I have to say, I did look pretty fabulous. I destroyed a perfectly harmless gray sweatshirt into an off the shoulder dream-come-true, ratted my hair into a magnificent side ponytail, and had some of the best eye makeup ever witnessed on planet earth. I won all three games because I kick ass, basically. (we did "name that theme song", "how well do you know the birthday girl", and "I'ma stick a card on your back w/an 80s pop icon's name on it and you have to guess who you are") I even came in top 5 in the costume contest. The winner was the b-day girl's sister, and boy did she ever deserve it. Tight rolled acid wash jeans, scrunch socks with white high heels, a denim jacket with cutouts and bows on the back, blue eyeshadow, frosty pink lipstick and CRIMPED HAIR. How the heck did she find a crimping iron?? She looked amazing.

I was having a pretty good night and then I came home, put the kids to bed and watched the movie, "The Last Kiss." What a mood killer, oh my Lord. I mean, here I am happy as a freaking clam in my relationship with L, and I go and watch this movie. It was so depressing. And why do I always relate to the MEN in the bad relationships?? In movie terms it was actually very good, kept you far as watching it while hormonal and PMS-ing like a freight train, umm...maybe you don't wanna pick this one up, ok?

Sunday was *cue scary music*....L's family barbecue. I got to his house and I met his kids (cute, cute, cute, OMG. I have to be careful that I'm falling in love with HIM, and not them, b/c they are great.) and we all 4 piled into his truck to go to the picnic...where I met his dad, stepmom, brother, sister-in-law, sister, brother-in-law and about 58 nieces and nephews. Yeah, not overwhelming AT ALL. They're all kind of quiet, so here I was trying to be Chatty Cathy and seem friendly...luckily his SIL was pregnant, so that gave us something to talk about. I really loved watching L interact with them. His brother is just like him, so funny and quick to laugh. He's an amazing dad, and I could tell by the way his boys looked at him that he wasn't just putting on an act for me. He'll play with them and do anything they ask, and he's not afraid to look like an idiot. That's good. That's how I roll (ha! always wanted to say that. It makes me think of Jack Black in Anchorman).

L is on vacation from work this week which means I won't get my 3 daily visits, my candy, flowers or cookies everyday (damn!), but I could get an entire lunch out of it instead, so yeehaw. We have also tossed around the idea of going to Memphis this weekend. Wow, a weekend getaway. What will I do with an entire weekend with no children clamoring for my attention?? Have sex. Lots and lots of it.